Country Christmas Classic: Collards

My mama (a southern belle through and through) changes up our Christmas meal every year. Last year it was lamb, ham the year before that, and this year we will be treated to prime rib (mmm!). But one thing never changes--there will be some seriously southern side dishes.

For many, southern side dishes automatically conjure up something starchy. After all, it ain't a meal south of the Mason-Dixon without biscuits, or rolls, or cornbread, with potatoes both sweet and mashed, or cheese straws, or dressing (what we call stuffing that never saw the inside of a turkey), or macaroni and cheese, or even grits. But we like to "go green" too. We like our beans green, unless they're black eyed peas, and our spinach creamed. But greens--collards or turnips--are a true southern meal staple and will make an appearance at many a Christmas dinner.

Collards and turnips greens have great nutritional value, and like any vegetable that comes in a dark, rich, emerald hue, greens are chock full of vitamins and antioxidants. But in the south, everything tastes better with bacon or fat back, and traditional greens are prepared in such a manner. Greens are often boiled for hours upon hours and seasoned with bacon, fat back, vinegar, or sugar. Here's a little bit lighter way to enjoy your greens that is a little bit nice [healthier] and a little bit naughty [bacon!].

Collards n' Bacon
--2 strips of bacon
--1/2 small onion, diced
--1 bunch of collards
--black pepper

Using your handy kitchen scissors, cut the bacon strips in half length-wise and then cut into small pieces. Fry up these tiny pieces in a medium skillet over medium heat until crispy but not too done. Scoop them from the pan and drain on a paper towel, making sure to leave about 1 TBSP bacon grease in the pan.

Sauté the onion in the bacon grease for several minutes until the onion is translucent. Using those same handy kitchen scissors, cut the collards away from the center stalk so you have two halves of each collard leaf. Cut the leaves into strips directly into the pan. Stir to mix with the onion and reduce the heat to medium-low. Sauté the greens, stirring regularly. The greens will wilt but will also get crisp on the edges. Lower the temperature further if necessary.

Add the bacon pieces back to the mixture and season with some fresh black pepper. (You won't need any salt--the bacon should provide plenty of seasoning!) Once everything is harmoniously mixed up and warm, eat 'em up!

Dammit Jim, I'm a cook, not a doctor...
Time: 15 minutes
Serves: 4
Calories: 75 per serving

I Confess, I'm A Sweet Potato Stalker

Sometimes I get crushes on restaurants and like any good school girl, I stalk their menus. The problem with having crushes on restaurants is that menus can change, leaving the menu-lover sitting in the rain á la every John Cusack movie made from 1985-2000. My newest crush is on a restaurant around the corner from my new residence, Fuel Cafe, who changes their menu every MONTH! On the one hand this is made of awesome because there is always something new and delightful to try. On the other hand, it makes me one sad monkey because I have a short window to get hooked on a dish, obsess over, eat it as often as possible, and then say goodbye to it.

The October menu featured a delightful gnocchi with sweet potatoes (not to be confused with gnocchi made from sweet potatoes which also sounds pretty delightful). As any stalker is bound to do, I made my own version of this dish at home so I could re-live all the blissful memories. Sigh...

Fuel Cafe Inspired Gnocchi With Sweet Potatoes
--2 large sweet potatoes, peeled and cubed
--3 TBSP butter
--1 12oz. package of gnocchi
--10 pieces of fresh sage
--1 cup fresh spinach, thoroughly washed and hand-ripped into palm sized pieces

Place the sweet potatoes in an oven-safe baking dish. Chop 2 TBSP of butter into chunks and spread chunks over the top of the sweet potato pieces. Bake in the oven at 300 degrees until potatoes are softened but not browned (20 minutes max).

While the potatoes cook, boil the water for the gnocchi. Cook the gnocchi per package instructions, omitting any oil. Drain and set aside.

In a large skillet, melt the remaining 1 TBSP butter over medium heat. Fry the sage in the butter until it is evenly brown and wonderfully crisp! Add the spinach, using tongs or a spatula to turn the spinach frequently so that it wilts but doesn't get soggy.

Add the cooked sweet potatoes and sauté until the potatoes are fully integrated with the spinach and sage and begin to crisp. Remove the mixture to a bowl.

In the same skillet, add the cooked gnocchi. Sauté for a few minutes, allowing the gnocchi to get brown, crisped spots on the outside. Add the sweet potato mixture back to the skillet and stir it all together. Serve!

Dammit Jim, I'm a cook, not a doctor...
Time: 30 minutes
Serves: 2
Calories: 510

Don't Go South For Winter, Just Go South of the Border

All cooks find inspiration somewhere. I read a lot of other food blogs and subscribe to recipe feeds. One of my favorite finds is from Whole Foods Market. While I don't always follow their recipe true to course, sometimes something they feature gets my brain into thinking along a path. This recipe is *almost* what was printed, but I of course had to make a few tweaks... I changed up the order of things and made my own "taco seasoning." I never was terribly good at following the rules...

Taco Soup
--1 pound of ground chicken or turkey
--
cumin
--paprika
--ancho chili powder
--garlic powder
--onion powder
--crushed red pepper flakes
--oregano
--salt & pepper
--1 medium onion, chopped 

--garlic cloves, minced
--1 large zucchini, quartered
--1 14.5oz. can diced tomatoes
--2 cups chicken broth
--1 15oz. can black beans, drained and rinsed
--1 cup frozen corn
--
1 cup salsa

Brown the meat in a dutch oven over medium high heat. Season the meat with the dried spices. Using a slotted spoon, remove the meat.

Add the onion and garlic to the pot and sauté until onion is translucent.Add the zucchini and saute for a few minutes to allow the veggies to start to get tender. Add the meat back to the pot. Taste it! Does it need more seasoning? Add some spices if it does!

Add each of the remaining ingredients one at a time, stirring to mix each individual ingredient before adding the next one. I don't know why, but in my head soups and stews always taste better when you add in each ingrendient singularly.

Simmer, pot covered, for 20 minutes, stirring occasionally. Serve with tortillas or corn chips.

Dammit Jim, I'm a cook, not a doctor...

Time: 45 minutes
Serves: 4
Estimated Calories: 396 per serving

Dear Breakfast, I Love You

Tip for making breakfast: Cook stuff you like. I happen to like goat cheese and portabella mushrooms. My BF would disagree (he can't stand goat cheese) and would vote for Swiss cheese and broccoli. Conveniently both of these are great breakfast choices when gently encased in a fluffy egg exterior. Omelettes people, omelettes. (Or perhaps scrambles people, scrambles).

Picking a vegetable and a cheese and putting it in an omelette is a surefire way to say, "Dear breakfast, I love you. Let's run away together to the Amalfi coast." It's okay to talk to your food. It is not okay if your food talks back.

Portabella Goat Cheese Omelette
--1 TBSP olive oil
--1/2 small onion, diced
--garlic, minced
--1 portabella mushroom cap, washed and sliced into 1" long x 1/4" wide pieces
--1 oz. goat cheese
--cooking spray
--4 eggs

Heat a skillet over medium heat. When the pan is warm add the olive oil and coat the pan. Sauté the onion and garlic for a few minutes, stirring regularly. Add the mushrooms and sauté for several minutes, stirring regularly, until they begin to soften and cook down. Using a fork, scrape off the goat cheese log into the pan. This will give you small crumbles that will melt and coat the veggies nicely. Stir to combine and remove the filling to a small plate.

Wipe out the frying pan with a paper towel, working quickly so as not to burn yourself. You don't need to get all the sticky bits off, just wipe it out well enough to give yourself a clean-ish cooking surface. Spray the skillet with cooking spray and return it to the hot burner. Use a small skillet if you wish to make two omelettes instead of one to share...

Crack the eggs into a bowl and whisk together using a fork [I don't use milk but some people like to add a little cream]. Still whisking, pour the eggs into the frying pan. The eggs will spread out to make a nice circle inside the pan. Cook for 2 minutes or until the bottom of the egg pancake is solid but the top is still liquid. Add the filling to the center or one side of the pancake. Using a flat spatula, carefully close the omelette by flipping the empty side of the pancake onto the full side to cover the contents, creating a half-moon shape.

Wait 90 seconds before attempting to flip the entire omelette over (though you might not need to as the eggs were mostly cooked before you squished it all together).

Dammit Jim, I'm a cook, not a doctor...
Time: 15 minutes
Serves: 2
Calories: 313 per serving

I'm Not Julia Child, But Who Is?

In Mastering the Art of French Cooking, Julia Child writes, "As is the case with most famous dishes, there are more ways than one to arrive at a good bouef bourguigon." I've never actually cooked any of Julia's famous recipes nor do I own any of her famous cookbooks (though Christmas is coming up *wink*wink*) but I absolutely appreciate her approach.

You see, there isn't a "right" or "wrong" way to cook necessarily--many good dishes come out of different styles. If following a recipe exactly isn't for you (and trust me, it's not for me) then think of each recipe as more as a guideline. The changes you make, the ingredients you add or remove, the ideas you glean, these all make the dish your own by putting your very own personal stamp on it. (And for those of you who think you're hopeless cooks, following the recipe step-by-step does NOT make you a bad cook. Some follow rules, others like to break them.)

Beef Burgundy (or bouef bourguigon to Julia) is a rich dish of wine soaked beef, carrots, onions, noodles, carrots. Part stew, part pasta, it is an excellent cure for the winter blahs or to warm cold bones. It makes enough for a feast to feed a large crew or to freeze portions for later.

Beef Burgundy
--6 pieces of bacon
--1/2 cup flour
--salt & pepper
--1 1/2 lbs beef stew meat
--1/2 small onion, diced
--garlic, minced
--2 large carrots, peeled and sliced
--3 dry cups assorted sliced mushrooms
--bottle dry red wine
--1 heaping spoonful of tomato paste
--14.5oz can of diced tomatoes
--thyme
--oregano
--1 small bag of frozen peeled pearl onions
--egg noodles
--beef broth

Cook the bacon strips in a dutch oven over medium-high heat. I use scissors to cut mine up into smaller pieces before sautéing. Once the bacon is mostly cooked (crisp but not too crisp), use a slotted spoon to remove it from the pan, leaving as much of the bacon grease/drippings in the pan as possible.

Season the flour with salt and pepper. Dry the beef with a paper towel and then toss in the flour to coat. You want the beef nice and dry so it will sear beautifully. Working in batches, sauté beef in the bacon grease until browned on all sides. Remove and set aside.

In the same pot, saute the onion and garlic for a minute or so until it is fragrant. Add the sliced carrots and saute a minute before adding the mushrooms. Saute until both are tender but not soggy. Add the meat back in to the pot. Dump in the bottle of wine, add some tomato paste, the diced tomatoes, and the spices. Cover and simmer for one hour, stirring only occasionally.

After one hour, add the pearl onions and egg noodles. Pour in enough beef broth to cover the noodles and stir all to combine. Cover and simmer on medium heat for 20 more minutes. Remove the cover and, if necessary, boil to the consistency of sauce you desire (though the noodles should soak up most of the added broth). Season with salt and pepper and serve.

Dammit Jim, I'm a cook, not a doctor...
Time: 2 hours
Serves: 6
Estimated Calories: 780 per serving